media
film
26 October 2021
Sex Unzipped: A Netflix Comedy Special
Rap superstar Saweetie hosts a celebration of sexual health and positivity with help from expert sex educators including Dr. Ruth, Dami 'Oloni' Olonisakin, and Alexander Cheves, alongside candid comedians and uninhibited puppets. Talking heads include Trixie Mattel, Nikki Glaser, Dominique Jackson, Mae Martin, and Michelle Buteau. Watch it only on Netflix.
podcasts & radio
11 April 2023
Authors Unbound: Alexander Cheves
Authors Unbound is back, and this week we have the pleasure of talking with Alexander Cheves, the bestselling author of the #1 Amazon LGBTQ Memoir, My Love Is a Beast: Confessions, published right here at Unbound Edition Press.
Alexander Cheves is a well-known author, sex-positive writer, and LGBTQ activist who has been featured in publications such as The Advocate, Out Magazine, and VICE. His book is a powerful memoir that delves into his personal life experiences, exploring themes such as sexuality, love, religion, and mental health.
During our conversation with Alexander, we discuss the importance of sex positivity and representation in literature, and how his book lends a voice to a section of the community not normally addressed. We also explore the topic of pushing boundaries within writing and balancing the expectations that follow notoriety and success.
But the highlight of the episode is when Alexander treats us to two readings from his book, directly from the chapters “Ghosts” and “Heaven.” The passages are powerful, emotional, and leave a lasting impression.
So, join us for this captivating episode of Authors Unbound, as we delve into the mind of Alexander Cheves, and explore the people and inspiration behind his groundbreaking memoir, My Love Is a Beast: Confessions.This is Alexander Cheves, unbound.
Listen on Spotify on wherever you catch your podcasts.
5 November 2022
Private Parts Unknown
For the 101st episode of Private Parts Unknown, host Courtney Kocak welcomes Alexander Cheves — sex writer, sex worker, sex educator, and author of My Love Is a Beast: Confessions — for a primer on fisting. In addition to fisting 101 tips, Alex shares his experiences coming out, living with HIV in a post-PrEP world (vs. in the 80s or even ten years ago), becoming a sex worker, becoming a sex writer, and writing his memoir. We also discuss tips for exploring kink, how the pandemic shifted how he thinks about his sexuality, and why he recently moved to Berlin, Germany.
Listen on Apple Podcasts or wherever you catch your podcasts.
9 September 2022
Poz Vibe Podcast, in partnership with Dublin Pride
Welcome one and all to Poz World: The Movement! This week, we've got not one, not two, but three gorgeous humans to share their experiences with the Poz Vibe community. Berlin based Alexander Cheves is a sex columnist and author of My Love Is A Beast: Confessions. We also chatted with Matthew Hodson, executive director of Aids Map. And we welcomed a returning Poz Viber back to Poz Vibe HQ, the wonderful Phelipe Lutterbeck, hairstylist and activist. We hope you love this episode.
Listen on Spotify on wherever you catch your podcasts.
26 August 2022
Himeros Backstage with Davey Wavey
Himeros.tv creator Davey Wavey is joined by by sex and intimacy coach Finn Deerhart and writer Alexander Cheves in a conversation about giving sex advice, taboo fetishes, unfulfillable fantasies, and why fisting can be a religious experience.
Listen on Apple Podcasts or wherever you catch your podcasts.
28 July 2022
Dennis Anyone? with Dennis Hensley
Dennis connects via Zoom with author and sex columnist Alexander Cheves to discuss his book My Love Is a Beast: Confessions, a collection of autobiographical essays about everything from his brutal coming out to going to bathhouses instead of dance clubs in the wake of the Pulse nightclub shooting to seeing the legendary Lady Chablis perform the first time he ever set foot in a gay club.
Alex also talks about his unique writing process and how he has to speak something out loud before he can commit it to paper. Other topics include: nearly giving up writing as a career just before he got the book deal, the blog that launched his career, his belief that there’s no such thing as “good shame,” what he’s learned working as an escort for over ten years, struggling with body dysmorphia, and why dance floors are his favorite places in earth.
Alex also reads his favorite passage from the book, which imagines various friends he’s lost, all coming together on a pulsating dance floor. Listen on Libsyn.
17 October 2021
The Shaun Proulx Show
Special guest is sex writer Alexander Cheves. His debut book My Love Is A Beast: Confessions is out now, and we talk, what else? Sex. Sex panics, pandemic sex, and more sex, in a for-real way you won’t get anywhere else.
Catch it on SiriusXM Ch.167 or any time on the SXM App.
12 October 2021
Savage Lovecast with Dan Savage (episode #781)
Ok, exactly how many people need to be involved for it to be called an orgy?
A woman has been mulling over something that happened 20 years ago between her and her brother-in-law. When she was 19, and her sister was away, her sister’s husband put on some porn, and asked her a bunch of wildly inappropriate sex questions. Then he asked her to keep their conversation secret. Unsurprisingly, they are now divorced. The caller never told her sister about this. Should she tell her now?
On the Magnum version of the show, Dan gets a Second Opinion from Alexander Cheves, a sex columnist for Out Magazine. They discuss hooking up with Trump voters, how desire for kink emerges early in life, and whether it Is “urbanist” to advise rural gay folks to move to cities.
And, a man has been with his wife for 20 years. She is done with sex, and he very much wants it. He likes to smoke pot in moderation. She insists that so long as he smokes pot, she will never have sex with him. Should he fully quit in hopes that she comes through on her end of the bargain?
Listen at savage.love.
15 June 2021
Good Sex
When Alex first saw fisting in porn, he never imagined that years later he’d be training people how to do the slow, sensual act across New York City.
29 May 2021
Paul Bright Films
Columnist for queer love and sex in Out Magazine, Alexander Cheves revealed deeply personal details about his life in this 30 minute interview.
Alex is also a contributing editor at The Advocate. He is an outspoken activist and sex worker who also runs the advice blog “Love, Beastly,” which is known for frank, unflinching answers to questions about queer sex and love. If you haven’t been following him you’ll be able to read his confessional book publishing in October – My Love Is a Beast.
In our conversation, we talked about how sex scenes in gay-themed movies don’t show what really happens, how wrong they got it in Brokeback Mountain, returning to an active sex life after Covid lockdown, and his experiences as a sex worker. A most fascinating conversation about what we want as gay men.
25 December 2018
Savage Lovecast with Dan Savage (Episode #635)
Gather round the Lovecast Christmas tree children, and see what audio gifts we have for you! Why, here’s a question from a power bottom who pees when he gets fucked! And look! A woman’s boyfriend won’t use sex toys on her if they’ve been used before. Should she ask Santa to get her some brand new, still-in-the-box butt plugs? And, oh good heavens, Dan’s friend Philip has some advice for a woman with hemorrhoids. He likens them to “a heart attack in your ass.” On the Magnum version, which you should give as a gift because it is the Season of Giving,™ Alexander Cheves, writer for The Advocate and Out Magazine, explains the disaster of Tumblr banning porn on its site. May your CandleNights be ever-bright.
Listen on savage.love.
22 August 2017
Savage Lovecast with Dan Savage (Episode #565)
What do you do when your best friend is dating a con man? A woman has been with her boyfriend for a year. He has a key to her apartment, and regularly lets himself in when she isn’t there, even though she told him not to. How big of a problem do we have here? On the Magnum, Dan talks to Alexander Cheves who published a controversial article in The Advocate about what place, if any, women have in gay bars. And, a woman’s best friend also happens to be her step-mother. (Same age though.) How can the caller counsel her pal on how to improve her sex life…with her father?
Listen here.
May 2017
The Swinger Lifestyle
Listen on CityWorldRadio.com or AdultSocials.com.
February 2017
The Shaun Proulx Show
I chatted with Shaun Proulx, "Canada's gay Oprah", about the passing of George Michael and the misconceptions of drug use among queer men. Listen on Sirius XM.
video
23 October 2022
Amber Live!
Let's see if we can make Amber blush! This week she meets Alexander Cheves, a LGBTQ+ sex writer, worker and activist, is devoted to fetish and kink. Cheves is best known for his work as a sex columnist for Out Magazine and as a contributing editor at The Advocate where he writes the widely read "Sexy Beast" column. He also runs "Love, Beastly," an advice blog known for its frank, unflinching answers to questions about queer sex and love.
13 September 2022
Tub Talks With Damon
On the 69th Episode of Tub Talks With Damon, Author and Sex Worker Alexander Cheves talks about his boundary pushing book, "My Love Is A Beast: Confessions" and shares many of his own "Confessions":
"They're terrified of us — It's great if we're on TV, it's great if we have representation, but society will never not have a scapegoat; they will never not have a punished class; they will never not designate a minority as somehow being unfit to have the same rights as everyone else."
"We disrupt their God, we disrupt their religion, we truly scare them. And with every bit of visibility of happiness that we have, and every win we get, we further frighten them."
"The body is an animal. It responds to your mood, to your sleep, to your environment. Trauma lives in the body in the ways you don't even know about. You have a relationship with your body, and I see mine as a wild animal. I can't always tame it, it's unwrangleable."
Watch all 69 episodes at TubTalksWithDamon.com.
3 January 2018
The Advocate: Ask an HIV-Positive Person with Alexander Cheves
Advocate columnist Alexander Cheves answers your questions on being positive.
3 January 2018
The Advocate: 10 Tips for Better Gay Sex
Advocate contributor Alexander Cheves on how to get more pleasure in your life.
media events
29 March 2022
Sniffies @ SXSW 2022 | Alexander Cheves on Anonymity in Digital Space
Sure we can be anonymous online, but anon hookups are a feature of queer sex that dates back decades.
At SXSW 2022, Sniffies presented a panel called Tech and the New Fluidity of Male Sexuality. With panelists Zachary Zane, Jacob Tobia, and Alexander Cheves, we discussed queerness in digital spaces, anonymous hookups, and the meanings of labels like "bi" "gay" "non binary" "queer" etc. in a world where gender and sexual expression is expansive and inclusive. Our panelists touched on the responsibility tech platforms like Facebook and Instagram have for the queer community, queerbaiting as exploration, and commodifying queer identities online.
29 March 2022
Sniffies @ SXSW 2022 | Jacob Tobia & Alexander Cheves on Queerbaiting
Is queerbaiting on social media exploration or exploitation?
With panelists Zachary Zane, Jacob Tobia, and Alexander Cheves, we discussed queerness in digital spaces, anonymous hookups, and the meanings of labels like "bi" "gay" "non binary" "queer" etc. in a world where gender and sexual expression is expansive and inclusive. Our panelists touched on the responsibility tech platforms like Facebook and Instagram have for the queer community, queerbaiting as exploration, and commodifying queer identities online.
27 February 2020
Beastly: An Intimate Conversation with Alexander Cheves (pt. 3)
Join San Francisco Leathermen’s Discussion Group as we probe the filthy and whip smart mind of prolific sex writer, kink activist, editor, and copywriter Alexander Cheves — nicknamed “Beastly”. He works in the areas of sex, relationships, wellness, and kink.
27 February 2020
LDG Presents: An Intimate Conversation with Alexander Cheves (pt 2)
Join San Francisco Leathermen’s Discussion Group as we probe the filthy and whip smart mind of prolific sex writer, kink activist, editor, and copywriter Alexander Cheves — nicknamed “Beastly”. He works in the areas of sex, relationships, wellness, and kink.
27 February 2020
LDG Presents: An Intimate Conversation with Alexander Cheves (pt 1)
Join San Francisco Leathermen’s Discussion Group as we probe the filthy and whip smart mind of prolific sex writer, kink activist, editor, and copywriter Alexander Cheves — nicknamed “Beastly”. He works in the areas of sex, relationships, wellness, and kink.